Hard Facts: 12 Solid Tips for How to Give the Best Handjob Ever

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Some jobs need a hands-on approach.

Experts say 92% of men masturbate — and, as the old joke goes, the other 8% are lying. It’s one of the first adult entertainments any man discovers, after all.

Yet as a sex act between partners, it gets a bad rap. It’s the “vanilla” flavor of the sex world.



But there’s nothing wrong with vanilla, and there’s nothing wrong with a good handjob.

Here are 12 rock-solid tips that will turn a handjob into something special.

Keep Up a Rhythm

To begin with, handjobs are all about rhythm.

Think of it as a piece of music. While you can start out a little playful, even improvisational, you really need to build up a structure to keep things moving. And for a man to reach his crescendo, he needs to feel the rhythm of the music.

Once you’re deep into the handjob, don’t turn it into too much of a stop-start scenario. A man’s body knows what masturbation and sex feel like, and it’s expecting a certain kind of pattern to bring on the orgasm.

The Master’s Voice

Men have a rep for not being as vocal in bed as women might be. That’s not always true, of course, but even quieter men give off subtle signals of pleasure.

It could be a sigh or a soft grunt, or a more prominent noise. But if you’re teasing out those kinds of noises, it’s a good idea to keep playing the instrument the way you’re doing it. Don’t make the mistake of switching things up for the hell of it just as his body tells you that you’re doing it right.

Listening can also be a little more metaphorical. Take a look at the expressions he makes. Did his eyes slide closed when you performed that little maneuver? Probably a good idea to keep going.

Grease the Wheels

For most circumcised men, a handjob without lube is like a seat with no padding: a little uncomfortable in the most distracting way. In a worst-case scenario, it can even be painful.

Using lube can make stroking the pole that much easier, and make things much more pleasurable for him. And lube is likely to be essential if you’re playing with any toys.

Don’t go absolutely crazy with the lube, though — you still want him to feel something. But enough to grease the wheels will get the job done. Unlike spit, lube hangs around, and you can always reapply if things get a little frictive.

An Expert Opinion

They say it takes 10,000 hours of practice to make an expert. Believe us, every man is an expert on his own penis. And because no two are the same, he’s THE expert.

So let him show you how it’s done. We don’t mean you should sit back and watch, but get him talking, even demonstrating how he does it. If you can imitate what he does and add your own flair as the cherry on top, then you’re guaranteed to please him.

Communication is the single most important aspect of sex. When you know what he likes, then you can deliver it every time. That’s just good customer service!

Belle of the Balls

We’re not talking truck nuts here: these babies are for more than just show.

Many men love to have their balls worked while there’s some action going on elsewhere. Balls typically need a gentle touch, but if you can find the way to tickle and finesse them, you can draw the right noises out of your man.

If you want to head toward the back room, you can also go a little beyond the balls to give a light touch to the perineum area.

Either way, this one’s worth talking out in advance. Some men love the extra pleasure this brings, but others feel understandably vulnerable about anything going near the ol’ Christmas ornaments.

Assume the Position

Think positions don’t matter for a handjob? Think again. Every man has his favorite angle when he does his own thing. It can feel vaguely off-putting to do it in a different one.

But you can also experiment by going completely outside the norm and bringing some novelty to things. Try putting your man on all fours, for instance.

It can also be a turn-on for a man to be in a dominant position. Consider kneeling in front of him as he stands, or let him straddle you — you can even let him unleash on you from this position if you’re in the market for a pearl necklace.

Let’s (Not) Twist Again

If there’s one mistake the a-penised among us make, it’s trying to go a little too fancy with a handjob. Like many classics, the handjob works best in its original form.

One common (and literal) spin some partners apply to the handjob is to try to make the up-and-down a little more interesting with some twisting. While this can work for some men, many others will find it an unpleasant and alien variation on something they’re intimately familiar with.

Stick with simple motions for the main task. You can always get creative elsewhere.

The Edge of Glory

Leaving a handjob unfinished is a quick road to sharing time with a very frustrated man. But that doesn’t mean you can’t postpone the inevitable.

Teasing a man to the brink and then pulling him back from it can take a handjob from something perfunctory into a sexy emotional playground. It puts you in a place of control — something you may both find new and exciting.

The longer a man spends on the precipice of orgasm, the stronger the explosion will likely be. And that’s talking both physically and mentally. It can be a real thrill for a man to unleash an eruption they’ll be writing down in the geological history books.

A Special Place

Again, people like to paint men as simple creatures. You’d think they have no erogenous zones beyond the obvious.

But plenty of men have sensitive spots all over the body. It could be the neck, the inside of the thighs, or even something unexpected like the backs of the knees.

Go exploring. Find the new, erotic places you’ve never found before on your man. Combined with the handjob action, they’re likely to bring his pleasure to new heights.

A Trip to Uranus

Alright, it’s not for everyone, and it’s not exactly something you do on the spur of the moment. But if you’re both comfortable with it, then a little anal play can take the whole (hole?) thing to the next level.

Gay or straight, all men have the same nerve-endings and erogenous zones in Uranus’ orbit. It’s not a question of sexuality, but one of openness and liberation.

If you’re both comfortable with it, then make a visit to that neighborhood. A man’s most secret spaces can bring him the kind of forbidden pleasure he can’t get anywhere else — and it goes with a handjob like a fine wine with a restaurant steak.

The Land of the Blind

When you’re ready to play with a little trust, the blindfold is a good way to go.

A blindfold can turn a man into a kind of sexy Daredevil — when you can’t see, your other senses pick up the slack. Without visual distractions, you begin to feel everything, and can really sink into the pleasurable sensations.

Blindfolding your man can put him in the zone. Men are so used to masturbating that they may have forgotten the early thrill of discovering just how much physical pleasure can come from the penis. A blindfold can remind him of that, putting him back in touch with his body and unhooking his pleasure from the world around it, turning it inward.

A Table for Two

If there’s a reason the handjob gets a bad rap, it’s because you’re doing for a man what he can do for himself. That’s not always a deal-breaker, but it helps to provide a little something extra than the ol’ up and down.

Joining in on the fun is a pretty good way to do that. If you begin pleasuring yourself, your man gets to see something he doesn’t see when he’s taking a few extra minutes in the shower.

When you’re both masturbating, the experience becomes a shared one, no different than the kind of shared experience you’d both get from penetrative sex. That can make a handjob into a complete package of sexual satisfaction, taking it beyond simple foreplay.

You can also consider dropping a little dirty talk into the mix. Let him know how much you’re enjoying the experience, and he’ll be all the more into it.

The Art of the Handjob

Handjobs aren’t the most complex art in the sexual world, but they’re still more than meets the eye. With these tips, you can elevate a handjob from masturbation-by-proxy to a sexual treat like any other.

Looking for some ways to take it to the next level? Check out 7 of the most popular sex toys for couples in 2019.



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